According to Lawrence, a battle is constantly going on between the two sexes. Woman, according to Lawrence, is generally to blame for starting this battle. Almost to the end of his life, Lawrence regarded a woman in love as a harpy bent upon tearing asunder the man whom she loved, destroying his personality and trying to absorb him into her own existence. The male characters in Lawrence’s novels, therefore, display a tendency to be the bitter enemies as well as the lovers of their wives and mistresses. Now as we know, sexual conflicts exist in real life but Lawrence gave to these conflicts between men and women an excessive importance. In sons and Lovers, this man-woman conflict is all-pervasive. The novel begins with the conflict between Walter Morel and his wife Gertrude, subsequently; the major part of the novel is devoted to the conflict between Paul and Miriam, Paul and Clara, Paul and his mother and between Clara and her husband Baxter.
The conflict between
Walter Morel and Mrs. Morel:
Gertrude married Walter
Morel with great enthusiasm and with great hopes. But her married happiness
lasts only for about six months. Thereafter her life with her husband gradually
turns into a kind of hell. Of course, there is fault on both sides; but the
conflict between the two becomes a permanent feature of their conjugal life.
Initially, the conflict begins when Mrs. Morel discovers that Walter is a
habitual drinker and that he has at the same time a tendency to bully her. She
is an orthodox woman of religious and moral views, while he is a man of a
sensuous nature. Besides, she is a well-educated woman, while he is almost
illiterate. Quarrels between the two begin to take place frequently even over
trifles. Their constant quarrels make the life of the children also miserable.
Walter now finds himself an outsider in his own house because neither his wife
nor the children would like even to talk to him. Now, here we have a glaring
example of the man woman conflict.
The conflict between
Paul and Miriam
Paul and Miriam fall
deeply in love with each other when Paul is just fifteen and Miriam is
fourteen. The love affair progresses slowly because Paul is by nature
passionate man while Miriam is by nature frigid. Though Miriam surrenders her
virginity to Paul, he begins to experience a sense of failure in his
relationship with Miriam even though Miriam assures him that, after marriage,
he would derive greater satisfaction from the sexual act with her. After a time
he wants to run away, to go abroad, or in some other way to remove himself from
the scene. When Paul proposes marriage to her, she replies that they are still
too young to marry. Then one day he tells her that he would like to break off
the relationship between them. Paul has often hated Miriam inwardly, and she
has also sometimes hated him inwardly. After the death of Paul’s mother, Miriam
proposes him to marry but he declines the offer. Thus the friendship, the
intimacy and the sexual relationship between Paul and Miriam have come to
nothing.
The Conflict between
Paul and Clara
Clara is a passionate
woman just as Paul is a passionate man. Therefore, the sexual relationship,
which is established by Paul with her, stands every chance of becoming a
permanent affair. Clara could have obtained a divorce from her husband and
could then have married Paul because the sexual compatibility between them is
perfect. Paul finds that Clara is sexually too possessive. She wants him almost
all the time. Even during the office hours, she wants him to find an
opportunity of kissing or embracing her. Paul tells her that love making in the
day-time has a suffocating effect upon him. She feels very bitter on hearing
these words from him. He then asks if she is willing to marry him, and if she
would seek a divorce from Baxter. But, to this, she replies in the negative.
And her reason for giving a negative reply is that, although she does not
belong to Baxter any more, she thinks that Baxter still belongs to her. Thus
the conflict becomes between them.
The Conflict between
Paul and His Mother
Occasionally
differences appear between Paul and his mother in spite of the fact that both
are devoted to each other. Some of the differences are of a minor nature. For
instance, when his mother suggests that he should marry a girl from some
middle-class family, he disagrees. He expresses the view that a woman from the
common people would suit him more. Similarly, when she says that a man should
aim at happiness in married life, he again disagrees. His view is that activity
and creativeness in human life are more important than mere happiness. But the
real conflict between Paul and his mother takes place over Miriam. Mrs. Morel
has developed a strong dislike for Miriam. Paul feels very distressed by his
mother’s hostile attitude towards Miriam. Thus the conflict between Paul and
her mother becomes.
The Conflict between
Clara and Her Husband
Clara had not been able
to lead a happy life with Baxter whom she had married of her own accord, and
not under any pressure. She had married Baxter because she thought that he
wanted her. On being asked by Paul why she had left her husband, she replies
that her husband had begun to degrade her by bullying her. She says that her
husband had begun to behave towards her like a brute. She also informs him that
Baxter had proved unfaithful to her because he had become interested in other
women. Here then we have another case of the conflict between a man and a woman.
However, Clara chooses to go back to Baxter and live with him again as his
wife. This does not mean that the conflict between them had ended. If the
conflict between Clara and Baxter does end now because they are re-united, it
is not because Clara has been tamed but because Baxter is now a broken man who
needs some prop in life.